I knew that I was getting large - my shirts were telling me as much. But, when Cole took this picture, I was a bit shocked by what I saw! Seven-ish weeks till we meet this little girl!
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Meghan's Nursery ... coming along
We did a bit more work in the nursery this morning, the area near her crib is ready to hold a sweet sleeping little one!
The Whole Area
Close Up of the Bedding Made by My Mom
Close Up of the Mobile Made by Me
Her room is coming right along - I'm so grateful for the beautiful bedding that my Mom did and for all the drilling, nailing, leveling, and furniture moving Cole has done!
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Dear Meghan,
Dear Meghan,
The time of our meeting is drawing nearer and nearer. And as it does I find myself with so many questions and curiosities.....
Will you have your Daddy's gorgeous blue-green eyes or my more subtle pale eyes?
Will you be a righty or will you develop your Daddy's left-handedness?
Will you be a brunette, a blonde, or a firey-red-head? All three are possible! Or, will you just be bald for a long while?
Will you have inherited my allergies and celiac disease or will you be like your Daddy and a perfect vision of health and adaptability?
Will you be shy and introverted like your parents or will you break the mold and be our social butterfly?
Will you have a pure & calming singing voice like your Daddy or be completely tone-deaf (but honest in your enthusiasm) like me?
Will you be as much of a mover and shaker on the outside as you are on the inside?
Will you prefer to escape into a good book or to work on math during school?
According to a friend of mine at work - you need to inherit my "cute nose." Do you have my nose or your Daddy's (which I think is quite cute!)?
Will you prefer to sleep in quiet or with music?
What is your favorite color? How many times will that change?
Will you be a cuddle-bug or a bit more hands-off (regardless of how you feel about cuddling, you do know your Papa will cuddle you, right?)?
Will you be a dig-in-the-dirt girl or a little princess? Or a little bit of both?
What will be your first word?
What will your little coos sound like?
What will your smile look like?
Little one, we are so excited to meet you. We are so curious; we cannot wait to discover and learn the little wonder God made you to be. You are so loved.
Love,
Mama
The time of our meeting is drawing nearer and nearer. And as it does I find myself with so many questions and curiosities.....
Will you have your Daddy's gorgeous blue-green eyes or my more subtle pale eyes?
Will you be a righty or will you develop your Daddy's left-handedness?
Will you be a brunette, a blonde, or a firey-red-head? All three are possible! Or, will you just be bald for a long while?
Will you have inherited my allergies and celiac disease or will you be like your Daddy and a perfect vision of health and adaptability?
Will you be shy and introverted like your parents or will you break the mold and be our social butterfly?
Will you have a pure & calming singing voice like your Daddy or be completely tone-deaf (but honest in your enthusiasm) like me?
Will you be as much of a mover and shaker on the outside as you are on the inside?
Will you prefer to escape into a good book or to work on math during school?
According to a friend of mine at work - you need to inherit my "cute nose." Do you have my nose or your Daddy's (which I think is quite cute!)?
Will you prefer to sleep in quiet or with music?
What is your favorite color? How many times will that change?
Will you be a cuddle-bug or a bit more hands-off (regardless of how you feel about cuddling, you do know your Papa will cuddle you, right?)?
Will you be a dig-in-the-dirt girl or a little princess? Or a little bit of both?
What will be your first word?
What will your little coos sound like?
What will your smile look like?
Little one, we are so excited to meet you. We are so curious; we cannot wait to discover and learn the little wonder God made you to be. You are so loved.
Love,
Mama
Baby Hoosier :: Week 32
This week, Baby is the size of a: butternut squash
Total weight gain/loss: 30 lbs gained
Sleep: Meghan's busy movement usually wakes me up around 5:00 - long before my alarm clock. But I am able to just lay in bed and enjoy feeling her explore her small surroundings. I have had a sinus infection that's been making sleep difficult - but I've still had great energy during the day! Yay!
Best moment this week: School is out for winter break - it's time to spend Christmas with family and have a few days to work on preparing for this sweet girls arrival.
Movement: Her movements are becoming much less "spastic" and seem more intentional. This week she seems to be actively exploring her environment - there have been a lot of intentional feeling hits/moves of her hands and feet; I imagine her with a deep thinking look as she explores. Every once-in-a-while she gets a good hit or kick to the lungs which just shocks me :)
Food cravings: cream soda, ice cold water, oranges, fudge, eggs, bananas
Symptoms: Pregnancy wise, I am feeling very good! Cole bought a birth ball and it arrived this week - sitting on that allows me to sway side-to-side to relieve some of the pressure/pain on my hips. While I am very aware of the extra weight I am carrying around, I am feeling much better than I expected to be at this point in my pregnancy!
Belly Button in or out: half in and half out - it's odd :)
Milestones: She now has her toenails, fingernails, and whatever amount of hair she will probably have at birth. She is putting on weight and filling her skin out!
Total weight gain/loss: 30 lbs gained
Sleep: Meghan's busy movement usually wakes me up around 5:00 - long before my alarm clock. But I am able to just lay in bed and enjoy feeling her explore her small surroundings. I have had a sinus infection that's been making sleep difficult - but I've still had great energy during the day! Yay!
Best moment this week: School is out for winter break - it's time to spend Christmas with family and have a few days to work on preparing for this sweet girls arrival.
Movement: Her movements are becoming much less "spastic" and seem more intentional. This week she seems to be actively exploring her environment - there have been a lot of intentional feeling hits/moves of her hands and feet; I imagine her with a deep thinking look as she explores. Every once-in-a-while she gets a good hit or kick to the lungs which just shocks me :)
Food cravings: cream soda, ice cold water, oranges, fudge, eggs, bananas
Symptoms: Pregnancy wise, I am feeling very good! Cole bought a birth ball and it arrived this week - sitting on that allows me to sway side-to-side to relieve some of the pressure/pain on my hips. While I am very aware of the extra weight I am carrying around, I am feeling much better than I expected to be at this point in my pregnancy!
Belly Button in or out: half in and half out - it's odd :)
Milestones: She now has her toenails, fingernails, and whatever amount of hair she will probably have at birth. She is putting on weight and filling her skin out!
Friday, December 20, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 31
This week, Baby is the size of a: pineapple
Total weight gain/loss:
Best moment this week: We are continuing to bask in the excitement of knowing that she no longer has placenta previa and things are moving forward normally. It has been such a load off of my mind - I had turned the whole situation over to God, knowing that he had a divine plan for her birth just as he had shown himself to have in her conception and pregnancy thus far. But, it was still something we knew had the potential to cause problems and something we feel blessed to have "fix itself" without the need for medical intervention. We are blessed - and have been cleared to travel for Christmas rather than having to consider the potential of bed rest.
Movement: Meghan's favorite trick these days seems to be sticking her hand and/or foot straight up into my ribs. It shocks me every time she does it; several times, most days, we argue about whether or not she can stay there. I am hoping that while we are at my parents next week she will let them and my little brother feel her move; she's a wiggle worm, but sometimes a lot of that wiggling is towards my back or ribs rather than at my belly where others can feel her.
Food cravings: peanut butter cookies, steak, chipotle, cream soda
Total weight gain/loss:
Best moment this week: We are continuing to bask in the excitement of knowing that she no longer has placenta previa and things are moving forward normally. It has been such a load off of my mind - I had turned the whole situation over to God, knowing that he had a divine plan for her birth just as he had shown himself to have in her conception and pregnancy thus far. But, it was still something we knew had the potential to cause problems and something we feel blessed to have "fix itself" without the need for medical intervention. We are blessed - and have been cleared to travel for Christmas rather than having to consider the potential of bed rest.
Movement: Meghan's favorite trick these days seems to be sticking her hand and/or foot straight up into my ribs. It shocks me every time she does it; several times, most days, we argue about whether or not she can stay there. I am hoping that while we are at my parents next week she will let them and my little brother feel her move; she's a wiggle worm, but sometimes a lot of that wiggling is towards my back or ribs rather than at my belly where others can feel her.
Food cravings: peanut butter cookies, steak, chipotle, cream soda
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 30
This week, Baby is the size of a: cucumber
Total weight gain/loss: we will find out on Friday....a little nervous for this after last month!
Sleep: Sleep was off and on this week. Sometimes I was super tired and slept well all night. Sometimes I was super tired and my back ached, keeping me up, a lot of the night.
Best moment this week: We had a sonogram last Thursday and Meghan is doing great! She no longer has placenta previa and she is no longer breach! Meghan weighs in at around 3.5 pounds. She is skinny based on measurements of her head and belly circumference. She is also tall based on the measurements of her leg bones. The ultrasound tech pointed out where different parts of her body are in my belly - she was exactly where I expected her to be based on her movement. She is folded in half and her feet are up next to her face - she had her toes-ies on her forehead while we watched her. Thus, when she is kicking me, she must also be kicking herself in the face. We got a few shots of her little face (when her feet and arms moved out of the way) and saw her cute chubby cheeks. She looks very much more like a baby rather than an alien in the pictures - I can't wait to pinch those chubby little cheeks! The first thing I noticed about her when her profile showed up on the screen was her little mouth sucking away - looks like a thumb or a pacifier will see lots of use soon!
Movement: She is still such a little wiggle worm - I love it! She moves all the time on the right side of my body - which makes sense since her head, feet, and arms are all in the same place. One night, Cole was laying in bed with his arm around me (or, us, I guess); she started kicking so hard that he had to move his arm or she was going to keep him awake! She likes to rock a lot - I think that is my favorite movement to feel. She also likes to kick me in the ribs; we have little "talks" about that.
Food cravings: snickers bars, peaches, oranges, bananas
Symptoms: much less nausea, much less heartburn (with some diet changes), and much more energy (with diet changes to increase my iron intake!), we finished some of my major nesting projects over Thanksgiving break and I am continuing moving on down the list or projects!
Belly Button in or out: still in, I don't know that it will come out, it's been pulled into a super thin horizontal line!
Milestones: Her big goals from here on out are to put on weight and to continue getting those little lungs and sensory systems ready for the outside world.
Total weight gain/loss: we will find out on Friday....a little nervous for this after last month!
Sleep: Sleep was off and on this week. Sometimes I was super tired and slept well all night. Sometimes I was super tired and my back ached, keeping me up, a lot of the night.
Best moment this week: We had a sonogram last Thursday and Meghan is doing great! She no longer has placenta previa and she is no longer breach! Meghan weighs in at around 3.5 pounds. She is skinny based on measurements of her head and belly circumference. She is also tall based on the measurements of her leg bones. The ultrasound tech pointed out where different parts of her body are in my belly - she was exactly where I expected her to be based on her movement. She is folded in half and her feet are up next to her face - she had her toes-ies on her forehead while we watched her. Thus, when she is kicking me, she must also be kicking herself in the face. We got a few shots of her little face (when her feet and arms moved out of the way) and saw her cute chubby cheeks. She looks very much more like a baby rather than an alien in the pictures - I can't wait to pinch those chubby little cheeks! The first thing I noticed about her when her profile showed up on the screen was her little mouth sucking away - looks like a thumb or a pacifier will see lots of use soon!
Movement: She is still such a little wiggle worm - I love it! She moves all the time on the right side of my body - which makes sense since her head, feet, and arms are all in the same place. One night, Cole was laying in bed with his arm around me (or, us, I guess); she started kicking so hard that he had to move his arm or she was going to keep him awake! She likes to rock a lot - I think that is my favorite movement to feel. She also likes to kick me in the ribs; we have little "talks" about that.
Food cravings: snickers bars, peaches, oranges, bananas
Symptoms: much less nausea, much less heartburn (with some diet changes), and much more energy (with diet changes to increase my iron intake!), we finished some of my major nesting projects over Thanksgiving break and I am continuing moving on down the list or projects!
Belly Button in or out: still in, I don't know that it will come out, it's been pulled into a super thin horizontal line!
Milestones: Her big goals from here on out are to put on weight and to continue getting those little lungs and sensory systems ready for the outside world.
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Maternity Photo Session
As a sweet, sweet gift, a friend of ours with a photography business offered us a maternity photo shoot to document the incredible journey we have been on with growing this sweet little girl. Morgan Lang did a great job; here are some of my favorites from our session (27.5 weeks pregnant):
There were some other great pictures that I will share later. They took advantage of parts of the nursery, but I will be sharing pictures of the nursery later!
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 29
This week, Baby is the size of a: acorn squash
Total weight gain/loss: I don't know right now, end of next week!
Sleep: Good sleep comes and goes. It's still much better than I was expecting for this point in the pregnancy on most nights - and for that I am thankful! We found out this last week that my iron is low - so that may also be contributing to my extreme exhaustion throughout the day.
Best moment this week: We celebrated the Thanksgiving holiday with Cole's family and we had a blast. Meghan was busy!
I also had my glucose tolerance test and passed! No diabetes here!
Movement: She remains a busy girl. She seems to fidget quite a bit. Yesterday she stuck a little fist or foot into my ribs; when I tried to move it, she moved it back. We repeated this process several times before she finally decided that maybe she didn't need to punch me.
Food cravings: Jason's Deli sandwiches, Snickers Bars, Roast Beef
Symptoms: I am anemic so we are working on ways to increase my iron intake. Meghan continues to grow and finding tops to wear with my under-belly work pants is getting very difficult! Heartburn is a frequent friend - but I have found that chewing gum seems to help a lot.
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: Meghan's skull is expanding for her growing brain. She is gaining bone strength, muscle mass, and fat quickly! She is using lots of nutrients for lots of growing!
Total weight gain/loss: I don't know right now, end of next week!
Sleep: Good sleep comes and goes. It's still much better than I was expecting for this point in the pregnancy on most nights - and for that I am thankful! We found out this last week that my iron is low - so that may also be contributing to my extreme exhaustion throughout the day.
Best moment this week: We celebrated the Thanksgiving holiday with Cole's family and we had a blast. Meghan was busy!
I also had my glucose tolerance test and passed! No diabetes here!
Movement: She remains a busy girl. She seems to fidget quite a bit. Yesterday she stuck a little fist or foot into my ribs; when I tried to move it, she moved it back. We repeated this process several times before she finally decided that maybe she didn't need to punch me.
Food cravings: Jason's Deli sandwiches, Snickers Bars, Roast Beef
Symptoms: I am anemic so we are working on ways to increase my iron intake. Meghan continues to grow and finding tops to wear with my under-belly work pants is getting very difficult! Heartburn is a frequent friend - but I have found that chewing gum seems to help a lot.
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: Meghan's skull is expanding for her growing brain. She is gaining bone strength, muscle mass, and fat quickly! She is using lots of nutrients for lots of growing!
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 27
This week, Baby is the size of a: rutabaga
Total weight gain/loss: 22 lbs - wowza this was a big month for growth! Not only did I gain quite a bit of weight (that was a scary stand on the scale!) but she is now measuring quite big
Sleep: Sadly, Meghan and I seem to be giving up sleeping at night. I can't get comfortable and when I find a comfortable position it either gives me back pain or upsets her until she starts kicking - which also keeps me up. Time to experiment with other sleeping positions!
Best moment this week: Meghan is just super wiggly. I love feeling her as she moves around and bumps and rolls around against me.
Movement: This little miss is a wiggle worm! I absolutely love feeling all of her little movements. One day this week, it felt like she was trying to burrow out of the left side of my stomach - I think she is starting to feel a bit cramped.
Food cravings: chipotle, dark chocolate, quesadillas, egg & bacon cups
Symptoms: sleeping is tough, she's moving a ton, morning sickness only once this week!
Belly Button in or out: barely in, but still in
Milestones: Meghan is opening and closing her eyes. Her lungs are capable of surviving outside the womb with medical support. She even has the hiccups sometimes!
Total weight gain/loss: 22 lbs - wowza this was a big month for growth! Not only did I gain quite a bit of weight (that was a scary stand on the scale!) but she is now measuring quite big
Sleep: Sadly, Meghan and I seem to be giving up sleeping at night. I can't get comfortable and when I find a comfortable position it either gives me back pain or upsets her until she starts kicking - which also keeps me up. Time to experiment with other sleeping positions!
Best moment this week: Meghan is just super wiggly. I love feeling her as she moves around and bumps and rolls around against me.
Movement: This little miss is a wiggle worm! I absolutely love feeling all of her little movements. One day this week, it felt like she was trying to burrow out of the left side of my stomach - I think she is starting to feel a bit cramped.
Food cravings: chipotle, dark chocolate, quesadillas, egg & bacon cups
Symptoms: sleeping is tough, she's moving a ton, morning sickness only once this week!
Belly Button in or out: barely in, but still in
Milestones: Meghan is opening and closing her eyes. Her lungs are capable of surviving outside the womb with medical support. She even has the hiccups sometimes!
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 26
This week, Baby is the size of a: head of lettuce
Total weight gain/loss: we'll find out again at the end of the week
Sleep: I can easily sleep for 10 hours at night....those nights are wonderful :)
Best moment this week: Cole and I had fun (well, more me than him) picking out flannel at the Veteran's Day sale to make some burp cloths and blankets for Meghan.
Movement: Meghan has been doing less forceful kicking and more just wiggling - my whole belly seems to be moving around now.
Food cravings: peanut butter, hummus on brown rice wraps, snickers bars
Symptoms: my sacroiliac joint has been hurting again - I am assuming because of the additional weight and the change in gait - I think that's just part of carrying this little girl as she gains the weight needed to be healthy on the outside
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: Meghan's ears are developing their ability to hear even more .... she should be able to hear Daddy's voice (in addition to mine) while we are talking. She is now 14 inches long and 1.66 lbs. She is practicing her breathing skills, as well.
Total weight gain/loss: we'll find out again at the end of the week
Sleep: I can easily sleep for 10 hours at night....those nights are wonderful :)
Best moment this week: Cole and I had fun (well, more me than him) picking out flannel at the Veteran's Day sale to make some burp cloths and blankets for Meghan.
Movement: Meghan has been doing less forceful kicking and more just wiggling - my whole belly seems to be moving around now.
Food cravings: peanut butter, hummus on brown rice wraps, snickers bars
Symptoms: my sacroiliac joint has been hurting again - I am assuming because of the additional weight and the change in gait - I think that's just part of carrying this little girl as she gains the weight needed to be healthy on the outside
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: Meghan's ears are developing their ability to hear even more .... she should be able to hear Daddy's voice (in addition to mine) while we are talking. She is now 14 inches long and 1.66 lbs. She is practicing her breathing skills, as well.
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 25
This week, Baby is the size of a: cauliflower
Total weight gain/loss: 13 pounds total this pregnancy
Sleep: since the time change, my new hours of operation have been 4:00am-7:30pm
Best moment this week: NOT having strep throat but just an sinus infection/upper respiratory infection - I took a day off work to rest and am starting to feel much better again!
Movement: She moves so much - and I just LOVE it! She is now moving up on my right side instead of just in my lower abdomen. Either she has flipped to be head down or she is learning to punch/head bang. When I'm reading, she can make my kindle bounce. And, because in that area her movement much more pronounced from the outside, Daddy can definitely feel her moving!
Food cravings: Chipotle, hummus, yogurt, oatmeal, peanut butter, dark chocolate
Symptoms: I have had morning sickness once, but other than that feeling good. Apparently I am starting to waddle when walking a lot at work :)
Belly Button in or out: in, but not by much
Milestones: Meghan is 13.5 inches long and weighs about 1.5 lbs. She is starting to put on all of that baby fat that will be so squeezable once she is in our arms! She is starting to grow her hair as well.
Total weight gain/loss: 13 pounds total this pregnancy
Sleep: since the time change, my new hours of operation have been 4:00am-7:30pm
Best moment this week: NOT having strep throat but just an sinus infection/upper respiratory infection - I took a day off work to rest and am starting to feel much better again!
Movement: She moves so much - and I just LOVE it! She is now moving up on my right side instead of just in my lower abdomen. Either she has flipped to be head down or she is learning to punch/head bang. When I'm reading, she can make my kindle bounce. And, because in that area her movement much more pronounced from the outside, Daddy can definitely feel her moving!
Food cravings: Chipotle, hummus, yogurt, oatmeal, peanut butter, dark chocolate
Symptoms: I have had morning sickness once, but other than that feeling good. Apparently I am starting to waddle when walking a lot at work :)
Belly Button in or out: in, but not by much
Milestones: Meghan is 13.5 inches long and weighs about 1.5 lbs. She is starting to put on all of that baby fat that will be so squeezable once she is in our arms! She is starting to grow her hair as well.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: Week 24
This week, Baby is the size of a: cantaloupe
Total weight gain/loss: don't know until next doctor's appointment - which is tomorrow since I have been exposed to strep several times this week and now have a sore throat!
Sleep: I am sleeping so well at night! I think that my body is just ready to crash from carrying around this sweet busy girl all day :)
Best moment this week: This weekend my paternal grandparents visited us and little Miss Meghan - it was fun to get to talk, watch football, and play card games with them!
Movement: Meghan likes to kick and bounce a lot. Times she is most active...when the music stops at church, anytime I lean over and "squish" her, almost anytime I am sitting still...basically anytime when I am not providing her with motion & noise.
Food cravings: plain yogurt, peanut butter, oatmeal
Symptoms: I am fairly hungry throughout the day which is a nice change - I have not had to take morning sickness meds all week! My rash on my face has gone away and calcium supplements seem to be keeping the charlie horses away.
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: While she hasn't let her Daddy feel her kick, he has been able to see her kick - she is quite strong! Sometimes I wish I could peek inside my stomach to see what exactly she is doing...I think she might be a gymnast! Here's a picture of the effect this sweet baby girl is having on my figure - she is growing like a little weed and people no longer tiptoe around asking me about the baby - everybody knows that this belly has to be a baby!
Total weight gain/loss: don't know until next doctor's appointment - which is tomorrow since I have been exposed to strep several times this week and now have a sore throat!
Sleep: I am sleeping so well at night! I think that my body is just ready to crash from carrying around this sweet busy girl all day :)
Best moment this week: This weekend my paternal grandparents visited us and little Miss Meghan - it was fun to get to talk, watch football, and play card games with them!
Movement: Meghan likes to kick and bounce a lot. Times she is most active...when the music stops at church, anytime I lean over and "squish" her, almost anytime I am sitting still...basically anytime when I am not providing her with motion & noise.
Food cravings: plain yogurt, peanut butter, oatmeal
Symptoms: I am fairly hungry throughout the day which is a nice change - I have not had to take morning sickness meds all week! My rash on my face has gone away and calcium supplements seem to be keeping the charlie horses away.
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: While she hasn't let her Daddy feel her kick, he has been able to see her kick - she is quite strong! Sometimes I wish I could peek inside my stomach to see what exactly she is doing...I think she might be a gymnast! Here's a picture of the effect this sweet baby girl is having on my figure - she is growing like a little weed and people no longer tiptoe around asking me about the baby - everybody knows that this belly has to be a baby!
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 23 Weeks
Well, I missed my post last week - to be fair, I had a crying-vomiting-migraine. It was a migraine pain I have not experienced in many years. But, here's what week 23 has been like...
This week, Baby is the size of a: grapefruit
Total weight gain/loss: +11 pounds total
Sleep: I have had much more energy the past few weeks which has been so nice. And sleep has been welcome at the end of productive days. I have started getting charlie horses during the night and am working on ways to make those go away.
Best moment this week: Listening to Meghan's heartbeat at the doctor is just so cool! She is breech and has placenta previa - but that has all been left in God's hands to work out however he wills. On the upside - we will get to have another ultrasound in a few weeks to watch her play, or really, to see if those things have been fixed.
Movement: Miss Meghan likes to move a lot when I am still, so I usually get to feel her dancing around before I fall asleep - I really like that special time together every night. If she's too busy for me to get to sleep, I can guarantee she will calm down by having Cole put his hand on my belly to feel her moving - she usually just stops!
(This was true until Friday. Now she moves all the time! She is super busy most of the day!)
Food cravings: plain yogurt, steak, chipotle (which my paras brought me for dinner on bosses day!), peanut butter, hummus - protein just seems to be a theme!
Symptoms: Morning sickness is off and on - in the mornings I lay in bed and wait to see if I'm going to need any medicine to get through the morning - I'm needing it less often! I have a red rash on my face and charlie horses at night - two things which people don't know why they happen, so it just gets blamed on raging hormones. I am trying a new lotion and additional calcium/magnesium supplement in my diet.
Belly Button in or out: still in, but not much
Milestones: Meghan weighs almost a pound. Her teethbuds are appearing under her gums. And she is gaining strength like crazy!
This week, Baby is the size of a: grapefruit
Total weight gain/loss: +11 pounds total
Sleep: I have had much more energy the past few weeks which has been so nice. And sleep has been welcome at the end of productive days. I have started getting charlie horses during the night and am working on ways to make those go away.
Best moment this week: Listening to Meghan's heartbeat at the doctor is just so cool! She is breech and has placenta previa - but that has all been left in God's hands to work out however he wills. On the upside - we will get to have another ultrasound in a few weeks to watch her play, or really, to see if those things have been fixed.
Movement: Miss Meghan likes to move a lot when I am still, so I usually get to feel her dancing around before I fall asleep - I really like that special time together every night. If she's too busy for me to get to sleep, I can guarantee she will calm down by having Cole put his hand on my belly to feel her moving - she usually just stops!
(This was true until Friday. Now she moves all the time! She is super busy most of the day!)
Food cravings: plain yogurt, steak, chipotle (which my paras brought me for dinner on bosses day!), peanut butter, hummus - protein just seems to be a theme!
Symptoms: Morning sickness is off and on - in the mornings I lay in bed and wait to see if I'm going to need any medicine to get through the morning - I'm needing it less often! I have a red rash on my face and charlie horses at night - two things which people don't know why they happen, so it just gets blamed on raging hormones. I am trying a new lotion and additional calcium/magnesium supplement in my diet.
Belly Button in or out: still in, but not much
Milestones: Meghan weighs almost a pound. Her teethbuds are appearing under her gums. And she is gaining strength like crazy!
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 21 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: pomegranate
Total weight gain/loss: not sure - I will go to the doctor in a week and a half.
Sleep: Meghan has made it quite clear that she is not a fan of the method of sleeping that I finally found worked for me. So, now I am trying using a body pillow to provide the support that I need to sleep comfortably for ALL of us - so far so good.
Best moment this week: Feeling her moving more often has been so much fun - I'm just waiting for it to be hard enough and/or for me to catch it in time for Cole to feel her.
My good friend, Staci, was cleaning out clothes from her girls and sold me a TON of beautiful clothes (super cheap) for Meghan - cute carters, gymboree, k-state, etc! Her closet is looking good!
Movement: Meghan is becoming much more forceful in her movements - she is gaining strength. For the first time, on Saturday night I was able to feel her moving without concentrating on my stomach! She was hitting/kicking so hard it distracted me from what I was already doing - much more than just the "flutters" of the last few weeks. It's so cool!
Food cravings: steak, yogurt, and ice cream
Symptoms: still some morning sickness, some shortness of breath, lots of wiggling baby in my belly, muscles are stretching around my belly, my stomach (while always hungry) is able to hold less at one time right now
Belly Button in or out: in, but much less in.
Milestones: She is swallowing lots of fluid now (her ultrasound revealed that her whole digestive/urinary system seems to be doing well with this). She is also developing meconium - her first poop - how cute (note the sarcasm?!?).
And, here she is. Growing bigger every day!
Total weight gain/loss: not sure - I will go to the doctor in a week and a half.
Sleep: Meghan has made it quite clear that she is not a fan of the method of sleeping that I finally found worked for me. So, now I am trying using a body pillow to provide the support that I need to sleep comfortably for ALL of us - so far so good.
Best moment this week: Feeling her moving more often has been so much fun - I'm just waiting for it to be hard enough and/or for me to catch it in time for Cole to feel her.
My good friend, Staci, was cleaning out clothes from her girls and sold me a TON of beautiful clothes (super cheap) for Meghan - cute carters, gymboree, k-state, etc! Her closet is looking good!
Movement: Meghan is becoming much more forceful in her movements - she is gaining strength. For the first time, on Saturday night I was able to feel her moving without concentrating on my stomach! She was hitting/kicking so hard it distracted me from what I was already doing - much more than just the "flutters" of the last few weeks. It's so cool!
Food cravings: steak, yogurt, and ice cream
Symptoms: still some morning sickness, some shortness of breath, lots of wiggling baby in my belly, muscles are stretching around my belly, my stomach (while always hungry) is able to hold less at one time right now
Belly Button in or out: in, but much less in.
Milestones: She is swallowing lots of fluid now (her ultrasound revealed that her whole digestive/urinary system seems to be doing well with this). She is also developing meconium - her first poop - how cute (note the sarcasm?!?).
And, here she is. Growing bigger every day!
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 20 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: banana
Total weight gain/loss:
Sleep: some nights I sleep great, some nights I wake up at random, and this past week there seem to have been several scary nightmares
Best moment this week:
20 Week Ultrasound was today: Meghan is healthy! Everything looks really good and she wiggles and moves all over the place! That was the coolest thing in the world....especially to see how she crosses her ankles - just like her Mommy!
We have started converting our closet into a family closet; some of the little baby things we have recently picked up were hanging on the bar. Cole, rather absent-mindedly made the same statement I have been making to myself when I walk into the closet "Wow, those are tiny clothes!" Soon and very soon, we will have a little one wearing those tiny clothes!
While rubbing belly butter/oil on my belly, we were talking about how round my belly is - it just looks like a soccer ball on my stomach! My belly sticks out so much and we are wondering just how far out in front of my body this belly is going to be come February!
Movement: Baby has been quite wiggly - nothing painful or even noticeable when I'm busy, but when I am calm and relaxed it gets to wiggling. I tried putting Cole's hand on my belly to see if he could feel it, but not yet.
Food cravings: these are getting less intense - but plain yogurt has been amazing this week!
Symptoms: still nauseous, lots of headaches, I can feel the muscles in my belly stretching to accomodate the baby, my hair is so much less oily than before - I only have to wash it every other day, which I love!
Belly Button in or out: still in, but a much less pronounced "in"
Milestones: Meghan's sensory system is developing - the brain is specializing in sight, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. She is also developing the coating that will protect her skin while floating in amniotic fluid for another 4.5 months!
Total weight gain/loss:
Sleep: some nights I sleep great, some nights I wake up at random, and this past week there seem to have been several scary nightmares
Best moment this week:
20 Week Ultrasound was today: Meghan is healthy! Everything looks really good and she wiggles and moves all over the place! That was the coolest thing in the world....especially to see how she crosses her ankles - just like her Mommy!
We have started converting our closet into a family closet; some of the little baby things we have recently picked up were hanging on the bar. Cole, rather absent-mindedly made the same statement I have been making to myself when I walk into the closet "Wow, those are tiny clothes!" Soon and very soon, we will have a little one wearing those tiny clothes!
While rubbing belly butter/oil on my belly, we were talking about how round my belly is - it just looks like a soccer ball on my stomach! My belly sticks out so much and we are wondering just how far out in front of my body this belly is going to be come February!
Movement: Baby has been quite wiggly - nothing painful or even noticeable when I'm busy, but when I am calm and relaxed it gets to wiggling. I tried putting Cole's hand on my belly to see if he could feel it, but not yet.
Food cravings: these are getting less intense - but plain yogurt has been amazing this week!
Symptoms: still nauseous, lots of headaches, I can feel the muscles in my belly stretching to accomodate the baby, my hair is so much less oily than before - I only have to wash it every other day, which I love!
Belly Button in or out: still in, but a much less pronounced "in"
Milestones: Meghan's sensory system is developing - the brain is specializing in sight, hearing, taste, smell, and touch. She is also developing the coating that will protect her skin while floating in amniotic fluid for another 4.5 months!
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 19 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: mango
Total weight gain/loss: I have gained a total of 5 pounds - yay for finally keeping enough food down to gain weight!
Sleep: I can stay up late a few nights a week, if kept busy. As soon as I sit down to relax, I get very tired. I am getting much more used to sleeping on my side - yay!
Best moment this week: While I was at the doctor's office on Friday, he would find the baby's heartbeat and the baby would immediately move. This process repeated itself several times before the baby finally consented to having its heartbeat listened to...is a little red-headed pistol on it's way?!?
Movement: I think I felt the baby moving around a bit a few nights ago - and we were listening to Gungor. I think this baby has good taste in music!
Food cravings: this isn't really changing...mint ice cream, vinegar chips
Symptoms: still nausea, belly growing pains - those muscles are stretching! super dry skin (except the acne on my face - grr!) - but I have a wonderful homemade butter that is great!
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: Baby is starting to myelinate its nerves; this, as we know from child development classes, is a VERY big deal! Baby will be doing lots of myelinating for the next year and a half or so - go myelin go! Build that baby brain and nervous system!
Total weight gain/loss: I have gained a total of 5 pounds - yay for finally keeping enough food down to gain weight!
Sleep: I can stay up late a few nights a week, if kept busy. As soon as I sit down to relax, I get very tired. I am getting much more used to sleeping on my side - yay!
Best moment this week: While I was at the doctor's office on Friday, he would find the baby's heartbeat and the baby would immediately move. This process repeated itself several times before the baby finally consented to having its heartbeat listened to...is a little red-headed pistol on it's way?!?
Movement: I think I felt the baby moving around a bit a few nights ago - and we were listening to Gungor. I think this baby has good taste in music!
Food cravings: this isn't really changing...mint ice cream, vinegar chips
Symptoms: still nausea, belly growing pains - those muscles are stretching! super dry skin (except the acne on my face - grr!) - but I have a wonderful homemade butter that is great!
Belly Button in or out: still in
Milestones: Baby is starting to myelinate its nerves; this, as we know from child development classes, is a VERY big deal! Baby will be doing lots of myelinating for the next year and a half or so - go myelin go! Build that baby brain and nervous system!
Monday, September 16, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 18 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: sweet potato
Total weight gain/loss: We shall find out on Friday.
Sleep: I am actually able to stay awake past 8 at night - most nights! Sleep is getting better as I am learning more and more to lay on my side.
Best moment this week: While awake Thursday morning, nervous about my upcoming talk with my principals about my maternity leave and plans to stay home with the baby, I felt the baby move. What a wonderful assurance that we have made the best choice for this baby!
Movement: I felt the baby in a way I would describe as a swimming movement on Thursday morning. Sunday night, while not paying attention for it (as I had the last two times), I am fairly certain I felt a little kick or hit. I'm excited to feel the baby more regularly.
Food cravings: mint ice cream, kettle chips, homemade chicken salad
Symptoms: still morning sickness, food cravings, feeling the baby move, if I pull my legs into my chest - apparently a favorite position to lay in - I can't breathe :)
Belly Button in or out: Very in.
Milestones: The baby can now hear! That makes it seem like it is beginning to engage with the world that will soon be it's home. Baby Hoosier is continuing to grow:
Total weight gain/loss: We shall find out on Friday.
Sleep: I am actually able to stay awake past 8 at night - most nights! Sleep is getting better as I am learning more and more to lay on my side.
Best moment this week: While awake Thursday morning, nervous about my upcoming talk with my principals about my maternity leave and plans to stay home with the baby, I felt the baby move. What a wonderful assurance that we have made the best choice for this baby!
Movement: I felt the baby in a way I would describe as a swimming movement on Thursday morning. Sunday night, while not paying attention for it (as I had the last two times), I am fairly certain I felt a little kick or hit. I'm excited to feel the baby more regularly.
Food cravings: mint ice cream, kettle chips, homemade chicken salad
Symptoms: still morning sickness, food cravings, feeling the baby move, if I pull my legs into my chest - apparently a favorite position to lay in - I can't breathe :)
Belly Button in or out: Very in.
Milestones: The baby can now hear! That makes it seem like it is beginning to engage with the world that will soon be it's home. Baby Hoosier is continuing to grow:
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 17 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: onion
Total weight gain/loss:
Sleep: I LOVE sleeping on my back; but that is no longer allowed. Trying to train myself to sleep on my side is proving to be difficult.
Best moment this week:
One student kissed my belly; after which he tried to lift my shirt to see baby. We had to have a conversation about how you can't see the baby until it comes out.
A friend from church let me look through & borrow her maternity clothes - we are similar in size and in colors we like to wear - I love all of the options in my wardrobe right now!
Movement: None yet...but it could come any day!
Food cravings: Energy is continuing to increase as the school year gets underway. I have had a bit of a baking itch this week!
Symptoms: Some lingering nausea - some days are great and some days are a bit rough.
Belly Button in or out: oh so very in
Milestones: Baby's scalp is developing hair growth patterns and baby is growing toenails. Its head is becoming more erect.
Total weight gain/loss:
Sleep: I LOVE sleeping on my back; but that is no longer allowed. Trying to train myself to sleep on my side is proving to be difficult.
Best moment this week:
One student kissed my belly; after which he tried to lift my shirt to see baby. We had to have a conversation about how you can't see the baby until it comes out.
A friend from church let me look through & borrow her maternity clothes - we are similar in size and in colors we like to wear - I love all of the options in my wardrobe right now!
Movement: None yet...but it could come any day!
Food cravings: Energy is continuing to increase as the school year gets underway. I have had a bit of a baking itch this week!
Symptoms: Some lingering nausea - some days are great and some days are a bit rough.
Belly Button in or out: oh so very in
Milestones: Baby's scalp is developing hair growth patterns and baby is growing toenails. Its head is becoming more erect.
Friday, September 6, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 16 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: avocado
Total weight gain/loss: I don't know.
Sleep: still tired; I am learning not to sleep on my back - my favorite position is now off limits!
Best moment this week:
One of my students is about the same height as my belly and has accidentally walked into my belly a few times and most times saying "Hi, baby." Another student, out of nowhere, looked at me concerned to say, "We need to talk about something very important! What is this baby going to be called?!? It has to be CALLED something!" Another student, after asking to feel my belly, since the child had never felt one before, was surprised that my belly was "hard" and he couldn't feel the baby's body parts. They are beginning to wonder and become interested in the baby. It's so cute!
Movement: none yet, but paying attention as it could start soon
Food cravings: sea salt and vinegar chips, mint ice cream
Symptoms: some crazy curly hair that's been my good friend for several weeks :) energy seems to be returning as I get further into second trimester and more adjusted to the school year - that has been awesome!
Belly Button in or out: in
Milestones: Baby is moving fluid through the lungs and respiratory track and is able to see light through fused eyelids.
Total weight gain/loss: I don't know.
Sleep: still tired; I am learning not to sleep on my back - my favorite position is now off limits!
Best moment this week:
One of my students is about the same height as my belly and has accidentally walked into my belly a few times and most times saying "Hi, baby." Another student, out of nowhere, looked at me concerned to say, "We need to talk about something very important! What is this baby going to be called?!? It has to be CALLED something!" Another student, after asking to feel my belly, since the child had never felt one before, was surprised that my belly was "hard" and he couldn't feel the baby's body parts. They are beginning to wonder and become interested in the baby. It's so cute!
Movement: none yet, but paying attention as it could start soon
Food cravings: sea salt and vinegar chips, mint ice cream
Symptoms: some crazy curly hair that's been my good friend for several weeks :) energy seems to be returning as I get further into second trimester and more adjusted to the school year - that has been awesome!
Belly Button in or out: in
Milestones: Baby is moving fluid through the lungs and respiratory track and is able to see light through fused eyelids.
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 15 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: navel orange
Total weight gain/loss: don't know
Sleep: I am still quite tired, but I am blaming much of that on school starting up. I have been having interesting dreams - I don't mind the silly ones, but the ones where I wake up breathing hard and petrified are not so fun!
Best moment this week: one of my students compared me to a picture of an overweight mummy on his worksheet, and another pointed to by belly and said "your baby SURE is getting BIG!" It's been funny to see their reactions and thoughts about the baby.
Movement: still not feeling any movement yet
Food cravings: I no longer desire pickles in the extreme way that I did....I do not NEED pickle juice anymore...which is good, cause that was weird! I do crave ice cream, particularly mint chocolate chip ice cream.
Symptoms: Still vomiting without meds in the morning; still not needing them the rest of the day. I have been having bursts of energy throughout the day during which I try to accomplish as much as possible.
Belly Button in or out: still in - I have a majorly "in" belly button, I will be surprised if it pops
Milestones: The baby can squint, grimmace, and suck it's thumb (no, baby!). Baby is making faces quite frequently as his/her brain is sending lots of messages to the face. Baby is making red blood cells, bile, and urine.
Total weight gain/loss: don't know
Sleep: I am still quite tired, but I am blaming much of that on school starting up. I have been having interesting dreams - I don't mind the silly ones, but the ones where I wake up breathing hard and petrified are not so fun!
Best moment this week: one of my students compared me to a picture of an overweight mummy on his worksheet, and another pointed to by belly and said "your baby SURE is getting BIG!" It's been funny to see their reactions and thoughts about the baby.
Movement: still not feeling any movement yet
Food cravings: I no longer desire pickles in the extreme way that I did....I do not NEED pickle juice anymore...which is good, cause that was weird! I do crave ice cream, particularly mint chocolate chip ice cream.
Symptoms: Still vomiting without meds in the morning; still not needing them the rest of the day. I have been having bursts of energy throughout the day during which I try to accomplish as much as possible.
Belly Button in or out: still in - I have a majorly "in" belly button, I will be surprised if it pops
Milestones: The baby can squint, grimmace, and suck it's thumb (no, baby!). Baby is making faces quite frequently as his/her brain is sending lots of messages to the face. Baby is making red blood cells, bile, and urine.
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 14 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: lemon
Total weight gain/loss: weighed in at last week's appointment, I have gained 4 pounds for a total of -2 pounds while pregnant
Sleep: sleep continues to be AMAZING!
Best moment this week: At my doctor's appointment, we listened to the baby's heartbeat - that is a sound I don't think I will ever tire of listening to!
Movement: apparently baby is moving like crazy right now - I just can't feel it.
Food cravings: pickles! I'm not a huge fan of meat but will eat it when it's got some serious flavor such as salsa!
Symptoms: Nausea is present, though starting to subside. My pelvic joint has been hurting (it did before pregnancy, it's just gotten more constant now) - the doctor did some PT on it and gave me some exercises which have been helping it to feel much better! In general, I am beginning to feel really good :)
Belly Button in or out: in
Milestones: The baby now has fingerprints. Its body is growing and becoming more proportional - the head is now only 1/3 of the baby's total length.
And, the baby bump, Cole says it doesn't really look bigger than two weeks ago - but being the one trying to put on pants in the morning - I can tell you it is getting bigger:
Total weight gain/loss: weighed in at last week's appointment, I have gained 4 pounds for a total of -2 pounds while pregnant
Sleep: sleep continues to be AMAZING!
Best moment this week: At my doctor's appointment, we listened to the baby's heartbeat - that is a sound I don't think I will ever tire of listening to!
Movement: apparently baby is moving like crazy right now - I just can't feel it.
Food cravings: pickles! I'm not a huge fan of meat but will eat it when it's got some serious flavor such as salsa!
Symptoms: Nausea is present, though starting to subside. My pelvic joint has been hurting (it did before pregnancy, it's just gotten more constant now) - the doctor did some PT on it and gave me some exercises which have been helping it to feel much better! In general, I am beginning to feel really good :)
Belly Button in or out: in
Milestones: The baby now has fingerprints. Its body is growing and becoming more proportional - the head is now only 1/3 of the baby's total length.
And, the baby bump, Cole says it doesn't really look bigger than two weeks ago - but being the one trying to put on pants in the morning - I can tell you it is getting bigger:
A perk of pregnancy that started showing up several weeks ago - curly hair! I am loving it (and loving being able to go from bed to in the car on the way to work in 30 minutes!).
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 13 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: peach
Total weight gain/loss: we will find out later this week
Sleep: I have been having more energy during the day, but still fall fast asleep very early in the evening.
Best moment this week: this has been a fun week of telling people about the baby....my coworkers at the special education coop, my coworkers at the elementary school, and dear friends of ours.
Movement: none yet...I cannot wait!
Food cravings: pickle juice is holding strong...we may or may not have a gallon of pickles and juice in the fridge :)
Symptoms: I am starting to feel really good - hello second trimester energy?
Belly Button in or out: very in
Milestones: The baby is opening and closing its fists, starting to use its mouth to suck, and its intestines (which have grown into the umbilical cord) are moving into position in its abdomen - I find myself praying over those little intestines pretty regularly. Hopefully this little one will not inherit celiac disease.
Total weight gain/loss: we will find out later this week
Sleep: I have been having more energy during the day, but still fall fast asleep very early in the evening.
Best moment this week: this has been a fun week of telling people about the baby....my coworkers at the special education coop, my coworkers at the elementary school, and dear friends of ours.
Movement: none yet...I cannot wait!
Food cravings: pickle juice is holding strong...we may or may not have a gallon of pickles and juice in the fridge :)
Symptoms: I am starting to feel really good - hello second trimester energy?
Belly Button in or out: very in
Milestones: The baby is opening and closing its fists, starting to use its mouth to suck, and its intestines (which have grown into the umbilical cord) are moving into position in its abdomen - I find myself praying over those little intestines pretty regularly. Hopefully this little one will not inherit celiac disease.
Saturday, August 10, 2013
Baby Hoosier :: 12 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: plum
Total weight gain/loss:
Sleep: still very tired early in the evening, but no more naps!
Best moment this week: realizing that there were more "not nauseous days than "nauseous"...maybe this morning sickness is almost over!
Movement: none yet...a few more weeks and there will hopefully be something to put here!
Food cravings: PICKLES!! or just the juice - I don't actually need to eat anything! but if there were pickle juice flavored hard candies - I would pay almost any price for those!
Symptoms: some nausea, but overall feeling much better - yay!
Belly Button in or out: still very in
Milestones: tooth buds are starting to grow, some bones are starting to harden, and baby is hiccuping as his/her diaphragm is developing
And since my belly is starting to show (especially in the evening!), here's a picture (taken in the evening at 12 weeks and 2 days). I swear, my belly was completely flat at the start of the summer. There's just nowhere in my short-waisted body for the baby to grow:
Total weight gain/loss:
Sleep: still very tired early in the evening, but no more naps!
Best moment this week: realizing that there were more "not nauseous days than "nauseous"...maybe this morning sickness is almost over!
Movement: none yet...a few more weeks and there will hopefully be something to put here!
Food cravings: PICKLES!! or just the juice - I don't actually need to eat anything! but if there were pickle juice flavored hard candies - I would pay almost any price for those!
Symptoms: some nausea, but overall feeling much better - yay!
Belly Button in or out: still very in
Milestones: tooth buds are starting to grow, some bones are starting to harden, and baby is hiccuping as his/her diaphragm is developing
And since my belly is starting to show (especially in the evening!), here's a picture (taken in the evening at 12 weeks and 2 days). I swear, my belly was completely flat at the start of the summer. There's just nowhere in my short-waisted body for the baby to grow:
Baby Hoosier :: 11 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: lime
Total weight gain/loss: we don't have a scale (except on the wii), but based on clothing fit, I would say I gained some weight this week
Sleep: Still falling asleep super early in the evenings. But, I have been able to give up midday naps - which is good since school starts in two weeks.
Best moment this week: Oh man - this was a great week!
Last Tuesday I had an ultrasound (the last one for a while) and baby was showing off! The heart was visibly beating, both lobes of the brain were visible, and the umbilical cord was visible. Several times the baby decided to really show off for Mama and flex its arms and legs - which was SO COOL to see. Everything looks super healthy.
Mom came up over the weekend and we worked on the baby's room. She made a dust ruffle and some sheets for the crib. We worked together to make a boppy cover, a changing pad cover, and to cover a lamp. The room is starting to look so cute and it was fun to spend some time crafting with my mom.
Baby also received its first gift this week from one of the sweet ladies that I work with. A brightly colored sock monkey, some sock monkey booties, and some ABC shoes - good things to cover those little toes in cold, cold February!
Movement: I got to watch a lot of movement, but unfortunately it will still be a while before I can feel it.
Food cravings: not many cravings, a lot of aversions still. However, I am starting to be able to, and actually NEED, to eat on a fairly regular basis. I have been thoroughly enjoying hard boiled farm-fresh eggs and chex cereal for breakfast. I sometimes continue to crave green olives.
Symptoms: nausea, fatigue, and the start of a little baby bump (especially if I need to go to the bathroom - like first thing in the morning!)
Belly Button in or out: in
Milestones: The baby is in the fetal stage now, and has been for a week. All major organs are in place and now just need to continue growing and developing. Baby has fingernails and peach fuzz is beginning to grow all over its body.
Total weight gain/loss: we don't have a scale (except on the wii), but based on clothing fit, I would say I gained some weight this week
Sleep: Still falling asleep super early in the evenings. But, I have been able to give up midday naps - which is good since school starts in two weeks.
Best moment this week: Oh man - this was a great week!
Last Tuesday I had an ultrasound (the last one for a while) and baby was showing off! The heart was visibly beating, both lobes of the brain were visible, and the umbilical cord was visible. Several times the baby decided to really show off for Mama and flex its arms and legs - which was SO COOL to see. Everything looks super healthy.
Food cravings: not many cravings, a lot of aversions still. However, I am starting to be able to, and actually NEED, to eat on a fairly regular basis. I have been thoroughly enjoying hard boiled farm-fresh eggs and chex cereal for breakfast. I sometimes continue to crave green olives.
Symptoms: nausea, fatigue, and the start of a little baby bump (especially if I need to go to the bathroom - like first thing in the morning!)
Belly Button in or out: in
Milestones: The baby is in the fetal stage now, and has been for a week. All major organs are in place and now just need to continue growing and developing. Baby has fingernails and peach fuzz is beginning to grow all over its body.
Baby Hoosier :: 10 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: fig
Total weight gain/loss: still -6 pounds this pregnancy
Sleep: I cannot seem to stay awake past about 8:00 - EVER!
Best moment this week: Cole and I attended a worship leader conference/concert with Vertical Church Band and Matt Maher this last week; too bad baby could not hear & experience any of the worship going on in the room. As the days go by, I am amazed that there will soon be a little person here to guide towards faith. We are fiercely praying that this baby will come to know, love, serve, and worship God. How amazing will it be to someday not only share in the worship experience with my husband, but with my child as well.
My parents went to a family reunion in Texas with my dad's side of the family. Dad had a plan for how he was going to share the news that he was going to be a Grandpa. Instead, on the way to the restaurant, my youngest brother (10) shared the news without understanding that it was a secret :) Oh well, everybody was excited anyways!
Movement: baby is moving, I just can't feel it yet
Food cravings: lemon heads (good for calming the tummy), green olives
Symptoms: nausea & upset stomach, pants just don't fit well - and if they are at all tight, they make me feel even more nauseous
Belly Button in or out: in, and hopefully for a while
Milestones: Baby has working arm joints. Vital organs are all working and fingernails are starting to grow. Baby is swallowing amniotic fluid and kicking.
Total weight gain/loss: still -6 pounds this pregnancy
Sleep: I cannot seem to stay awake past about 8:00 - EVER!
Best moment this week: Cole and I attended a worship leader conference/concert with Vertical Church Band and Matt Maher this last week; too bad baby could not hear & experience any of the worship going on in the room. As the days go by, I am amazed that there will soon be a little person here to guide towards faith. We are fiercely praying that this baby will come to know, love, serve, and worship God. How amazing will it be to someday not only share in the worship experience with my husband, but with my child as well.
My parents went to a family reunion in Texas with my dad's side of the family. Dad had a plan for how he was going to share the news that he was going to be a Grandpa. Instead, on the way to the restaurant, my youngest brother (10) shared the news without understanding that it was a secret :) Oh well, everybody was excited anyways!
Movement: baby is moving, I just can't feel it yet
Food cravings: lemon heads (good for calming the tummy), green olives
Symptoms: nausea & upset stomach, pants just don't fit well - and if they are at all tight, they make me feel even more nauseous
Belly Button in or out: in, and hopefully for a while
Milestones: Baby has working arm joints. Vital organs are all working and fingernails are starting to grow. Baby is swallowing amniotic fluid and kicking.
Baby Hoosier :: 9 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: grape
Total weight gain/loss: still no weight change; -6 pounds for the pregnancy thus far
Sleep: The weird and un-followable dreams continue! But, I sleep well during the night and am still enjoying naps in the day.
Best moment this week: We had an ultrasound last week - the baby has grown so much in the two weeks since our last appointment. Baby continued to measure right on track and his/her heartbeat was 160-something - much higher than two weeks ago.
At that appointment, we "graduated" from the infertility clinic for pre-natal care and starting this week we will begin seeing my doctor (a DO who is Cole's doctor and my doctor; he will be delivering the baby and then will be the baby's pediatrician). I like my doctor a lot and cannot wait to be back in his care and start talking about his plan for the remainder of this pregnancy!
Movement: None yet - can't wait!
Food cravings: Still not craving foods - most foods sound awful until I start eating - then I usually find that I am starving!
Symptoms: morning sickness is still decently controlled by the medicine, which I am very grateful for! still very tired. pants are getting a bit tight :)
Belly Button in or out: in - and hopefully for a while!
Milestones: Baby is out of the embryonic stage and into the fetal stage. Baby's fingers and toes are no longer webbed!
Total weight gain/loss: still no weight change; -6 pounds for the pregnancy thus far
Sleep: The weird and un-followable dreams continue! But, I sleep well during the night and am still enjoying naps in the day.
Best moment this week: We had an ultrasound last week - the baby has grown so much in the two weeks since our last appointment. Baby continued to measure right on track and his/her heartbeat was 160-something - much higher than two weeks ago.
Movement: None yet - can't wait!
Food cravings: Still not craving foods - most foods sound awful until I start eating - then I usually find that I am starving!
Symptoms: morning sickness is still decently controlled by the medicine, which I am very grateful for! still very tired. pants are getting a bit tight :)
Belly Button in or out: in - and hopefully for a while!
Milestones: Baby is out of the embryonic stage and into the fetal stage. Baby's fingers and toes are no longer webbed!
Baby Hoosier :: 8 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: kidney bean
Total weight gain/loss: no change since 6 weeks
Sleep: I generally sleep well, but am starting to wake up in the middle of the night.
Best moment this week: telling Great-Grandma Stehr and Great-Aunt Nancy & Great Uncle Geoff
Movement: apparently baby is moving a lot; just can't feel it yet
Food cravings: chipotle burritos and store bought pizza - thanks to my Dad and Dad-in-Law for meeting those cravings! and, sour gummies are so good for nausea
Symptoms: morning sickness (much helped by meds!), exhaustion, bloating, and some really confusing dreams - they aren't scary at all, but they have NO story line when I think about them while awake!
Belly Button in or out: in, probably for a while
Milestones: Baby has little fingers and toes starting to make their appearance. Baby is losing it's tail and starting to move around like crazy - just can't wait to feel it!
Total weight gain/loss: no change since 6 weeks
Sleep: I generally sleep well, but am starting to wake up in the middle of the night.
Best moment this week: telling Great-Grandma Stehr and Great-Aunt Nancy & Great Uncle Geoff
Movement: apparently baby is moving a lot; just can't feel it yet
Food cravings: chipotle burritos and store bought pizza - thanks to my Dad and Dad-in-Law for meeting those cravings! and, sour gummies are so good for nausea
Symptoms: morning sickness (much helped by meds!), exhaustion, bloating, and some really confusing dreams - they aren't scary at all, but they have NO story line when I think about them while awake!
Belly Button in or out: in, probably for a while
Milestones: Baby has little fingers and toes starting to make their appearance. Baby is losing it's tail and starting to move around like crazy - just can't wait to feel it!
Baby Hoosier :: 7 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: blueberry
Total weight gain/loss: -6 pounds thus far (boo! morning sickness)
Sleep: I've started having some weird dreams lately, which disrupt sleep slightly...odd. But, 20 minute power naps keep me going through the day.
Best moment this week: We had a six week sonogram on Friday June 18th. Baby measured in at 6 1/2 weeks - and we heard his/her heartbeat!! It was simply amazing! The heart is beating at 119 beats per minute.
We told my siblings about the baby this week! Jordan was staying with us and instantly wanted to watch Father of the Bride 2. Zach was a dean at camp, and just kept repeating that he was "on cloud nine!" Lauren was super excited and is already working on planning for her first trip to meet the baby next spring.
We told Matt and Heather, Cole's brother and his wife, by asking their son if he's ready to have a cousin to play with in Kansas City in February. He didn't really have anything to say (at 10 months) but his parents were so excited.
Movement: none yet...can't wait!
Food cravings: still just aversions. sour candy is usually pretty good at calming the tummy, though. Cole went to Walmart to pick up some rice cakes and sour candy for me....he bought one of every sour candy he could find that was gluten free....LOVE that boy!
Symptoms: morning sickness, day sickness, night sickness....only in pregnancy does lots of throwing up = healthy baby; we are praising God for a healthy baby! The doctor prescribed medication to decrease nausea as I was becoming very dehydrated. It has helped so much in the last two days and I am feeling much better with some nutrients and LIQUID in my system!
Belly Button in or out: in, hopefully for a while!
Milestones: Baby is working on growing arms and legs. As well as the sensory organs - honestly baby is growing so fast and in so many ways each week that it's hard to even keep track!
Total weight gain/loss: -6 pounds thus far (boo! morning sickness)
Sleep: I've started having some weird dreams lately, which disrupt sleep slightly...odd. But, 20 minute power naps keep me going through the day.
Best moment this week: We had a six week sonogram on Friday June 18th. Baby measured in at 6 1/2 weeks - and we heard his/her heartbeat!! It was simply amazing! The heart is beating at 119 beats per minute.
We told Matt and Heather, Cole's brother and his wife, by asking their son if he's ready to have a cousin to play with in Kansas City in February. He didn't really have anything to say (at 10 months) but his parents were so excited.
Movement: none yet...can't wait!
Food cravings: still just aversions. sour candy is usually pretty good at calming the tummy, though. Cole went to Walmart to pick up some rice cakes and sour candy for me....he bought one of every sour candy he could find that was gluten free....LOVE that boy!
Belly Button in or out: in, hopefully for a while!
Milestones: Baby is working on growing arms and legs. As well as the sensory organs - honestly baby is growing so fast and in so many ways each week that it's hard to even keep track!
Baby Hoosier :: 6 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: corn kernal
Total weight gain/loss: haven't really checked
Sleep: I am getting great sleep at night! Usually from 8:30-5:45!
Best moment this week: We watched videos online of how and when the baby will grow - it's so amazing how in 40 weeks it will go from 2 cells to a baby. How can someone understand this process and not believe in a creator?
Movement: baby is still too small
Food cravings: yogurt and juicy fruits-all cold! no cravings, but an aversion to most foods
Symptoms: Well, hello morning sickness! It started out with just a queasy feeling for most of the day and has turned into great difficulty keeping anything down - like mother like daughter :)
Belly Button in or out: in - hopefully for a while
Milestones: Baby's heart is starting to beat & his/her mouth, ears, and nose are starting to form!
Total weight gain/loss: haven't really checked
Sleep: I am getting great sleep at night! Usually from 8:30-5:45!
Best moment this week: We watched videos online of how and when the baby will grow - it's so amazing how in 40 weeks it will go from 2 cells to a baby. How can someone understand this process and not believe in a creator?
Movement: baby is still too small
Food cravings: yogurt and juicy fruits-all cold! no cravings, but an aversion to most foods
Symptoms: Well, hello morning sickness! It started out with just a queasy feeling for most of the day and has turned into great difficulty keeping anything down - like mother like daughter :)
Belly Button in or out: in - hopefully for a while
Milestones: Baby's heart is starting to beat & his/her mouth, ears, and nose are starting to form!
Baby Hoosier :: 5 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: sesame seed
Total weight gain/loss: 0 pounds (I think, I haven't checked)
Sleep: 20 minute power naps are my new best friend :)
Best moment this week: worship night at church - praising God for the absolute MIRACLE of this baby!
Movement: none yet
Food cravings: I can't seem to get enough ice cold water or V8 juice.
Symptoms: brushing my teeth now MAJORLY triggers my gag reflex; I wake up ready for a nap or ready to go back to bed
Belly Button in or out: in, hopefully for a while!
Milestones: baby's spinal tube is starting to develop and will soon become a brain and spinal cord
Total weight gain/loss: 0 pounds (I think, I haven't checked)
Sleep: 20 minute power naps are my new best friend :)
Best moment this week: worship night at church - praising God for the absolute MIRACLE of this baby!
Movement: none yet
Food cravings: I can't seem to get enough ice cold water or V8 juice.
Symptoms: brushing my teeth now MAJORLY triggers my gag reflex; I wake up ready for a nap or ready to go back to bed
Belly Button in or out: in, hopefully for a while!
Milestones: baby's spinal tube is starting to develop and will soon become a brain and spinal cord
Baby Hoosier :: 4 Weeks
This week, Baby is the size of a: poppy seed
Total weight gain/loss: 0 lbs
Sleep: I want to sleep ALL THE TIME. Definitely by 8:00 pm.
Best moment this week: Finding out (Monday) that Baby Hoosier does, in fact, exist. Telling our parents was also super exciting.
Movement: Nope.
Food cravings: I don't really like sweets this week.
Symptoms: bloating, tired
Belly Button in or out: in, hopefully for quite a while still
Milestones: We're pregnant! That's a pretty big milestone!
Total weight gain/loss: 0 lbs
Sleep: I want to sleep ALL THE TIME. Definitely by 8:00 pm.
Best moment this week: Finding out (Monday) that Baby Hoosier does, in fact, exist. Telling our parents was also super exciting.
Movement: Nope.
Food cravings: I don't really like sweets this week.
Symptoms: bloating, tired
Belly Button in or out: in, hopefully for quite a while still
Milestones: We're pregnant! That's a pretty big milestone!
...then comes baby in a baby carriage.
I have been ready to be a Mama since I was seven. Maybe six, maybe younger. It's always been what I knew I wanted to do in life...to grow up to be a wife and a mom.
When we got married, we said we wanted to start having children when I was going into my fifth year of teaching. After much prayer and consideration, we felt that this was God's will for our family.
We were planners and we saw no reason why that plan would not work.
Fast forward a few years, and I'm finished with college and masters work. I'm in my third year of teaching. I recently switched doctors because my doctor did not seemed concerned about the issues I was sharing with him. The intense pain in my abdomen upon eating has increased, my digestive system is all out of whack, I am gaining weight for no apparent reason, and I'm exhausted all the time. Add to that that I've been experiencing "that time of the month" for the past four weeks straight - I had enough and went to see my new doctor.
To say that he was concerned would be an understatement. If it's possible to run a test, I think it was run on me that day. A week later, I was back to discuss the results and where we would move from here.
The blood tests confirmed - celiac disease. Celiac disease was slowly destroying my digestive system from the inside out. A gluten free diet would need to be implemented starting today and for the rest of my life. But, one of the rarely discussed side effects of being so sick from celiac - is infertility. Something my recently whack-job menstrual cycles had me worried about.
That same day, my doctor also proposed a diagnosis of Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). To diagnose PCOS officially, you need to do an ultrasound of the ovaries, but I had all of the classic externally visible signs - irregular cycles, male pattern hair growth (on the chin and belly button....that makes you feel sexy!), and terrible acne. PCOS is one of the leading causes of infertility in women.
Great! Two potential causes of infertility in one day - that dream of starting a family in a few short months felt like it was shattering all around me.
My doctor and I discussed a plan to try to heal my body:
1) Gluten Free Diet - doing this would drastically improve the health of my body. And, doing this could reverse the infertility effect of celiac. (I wrote extensively about my celiac healing here.)
2) Chart my cycles for at least the next year to see what is happening with my reproductive system. From there we could get a better idea of what my body does naturally, if PCOS might be the cause of my problems, and what we would need to do to allow Cole and I to start a family.
So, armed with nothing by my super-ability of researching things to death, I left the doctors office with a mixed feeling of relief (we might have an answer!) and trepidation (there's a whole lot going wrong!).
I poured myself into research - first about celiac disease and eating gluten free - because it had the most immediate need to be dealt with. I began implementing a gluten free diet and my digestive system began to heal.
Thanks to a great friend and much more research I learned to chart my cycles and secondary fertility signs. It was official - my body was a wreck! My cycles were coming more regularly than before beginning to heal from celiac (now it was only 20-40 days between cycles instead of 7 days-4 months). But nothing was happening in my ovaries; I was not ovulating. That's kinda necessary to make a baby.
In the winter of my fourth year of teaching, I gathered all of my charts and went back to the doctor. He confirmed that yes, there was a serious problem here. And we started talking about options. First, we talked about diet for women with PCOS. PCOS effects insulin and so food is a big deal in helping the body to operate at it's highest potential ability and to stave of secondary conditions which are very common. Because dealing with infertility wasn't enough - I found out in my research that I am at a much higher risk for diabetes and cancer as a result of PCOS (yay!). I had already researched this quite a bit and begun to make even more drastic changes in my diet. We also started trying a medication that helps some women with PCOS to begin ovulating by affecting insulin levels.
Being on that medication was NOT FUN! Because of my already healthy diet, I did not need a medication to help control my blood sugar and my blood sugar levels began dropping so low that I was tired, physically slow, and got quite dizzy on a very regular basis. It was determined that all of my work on my diet was helping to control my blood sugar quite well (one point for my research skills!) and at my next doctor's appointment, I was taken off those drugs. At that same appointment I was discharged with the official diagnosis of infertility and a referral to see the infertility specialist at the hospital.
A few weeks later, on what was a very dark and rainy Kansas morning (funny how the weather sometimes matches your current feelings), I pulled into the hospital parking lot, with shaking hands wandered my way to the fourth floor, and into the infertility clinic. I met with a nurse practitioner. She was a very very kind person and gently explained PCOS in further detail; we discussed in further detail diet and lifestyle recommendations and also diabetes and cancer. We also discussed options for how Cole and I could begin the process of starting our family. We would be able to begin by using the drug Clomid to convince my body that it was time to develop an egg and release it. I was told that when we were ready to start, to call the clinic (on a certain day in my cycle) and they would send in the prescription. As I walked out of the clinic, I felt on one hand overwhelmed by all the information I had just been given, but more than that, I felt relieved. These people specialized in people like me - in that clinic, I was "normal". They had a plan and we had options!
Several weeks later, I called the office and started medication. I had heard from some friends that being on Clomid made them very emotional. I was ready to ride the roller coaster of emotions (seeing as how I am an incredibly emotional person, anyways!). But surprisingly, I was less emotional than normal. It was kind of a nice change. Part way through the month, I went into the office for a sonogram to see how well the Clomid worked (and, in case I had developed like 8 eggs - to know we shouldn't try for a baby this month!). The first thing the nurse practitioner said while looking at my ovaries was "Wow! Many, many cysts! You definitely have the official diagnosis of PCOS." That was quickly followed by a finger point and a "Do you see that? That's a fully developed egg ready to be released!" I was given a shot of hCG (to trigger my body to ovulate) and told "good luck!"
The day that I ovulated, I was very aware that something was happening that I had never experienced before. All of a sudden I knew what other women were talking about when they said they get very grumpy around that time of the month. Holy cow! I had never felt so grumpy in my life! Just another confirmation that this was not something my body typically did on it's own.
Two weeks later....I woke up early on the morning I had been told to take my pregnancy test. My eyes were filled with tears; I was so nervous and did not want to do this. I have several friends who had been through this process before and I knew that it had taken them many months, sometimes years, to get a positive pregnancy test and I wasn't sure that I was ready to handle having this experience month after month for the next however long. I prayed long and hard (praying for courage through this journey had become a very constant prayer of mine over the last several months). Then, I took the test.
I sat in the next room, where I could not see what was happening, and waited the full time. When I went in, I was fairly certain what I was seeing was a positive. I was sure it was just wishful thinking and checked it, looked at the wall, checked it, looked at the wall....several times. Then I went, at 5:45, and shook Cole awake. "I just took a pregnancy test. I think it's positive but I can't be sure. You HAVE to come check this. I have to know I'm not just crazy." Poor boy - I think I pulled him out of REM sleep. But, he confirmed what I saw - it looked like a positive.
I was so happy, but had to keep that feeling in check. For one, Cole's dad was staying at our house and we weren't going to tell him yet. And two, I needed to have a blood test done to confirm the pregnancy; it could just be a false positive. I called the clinic and had my blood taken at 8:00 am. Then waited all day - until about 3:30 to hear back that, indeed, we were pregnant!!
We told Cole's dad, we called his mom, and my parents.
And I cried....a lot! Some very, very happy tears!
I felt a bit like we had cheated. We conceived in one month of treatment - I don't know anybody who has seen that happen. It was a miracle to say the very least.
God had worked his plan that he had set in our hearts years before out in our lives. It was not AT ALL the way I expected. But, wow, did it stretch me. And teach me to depend on him. And to release any small amount of control that I thought (keyword: thought) I had over my life and surrender myself and my desires fully to him.
--------
The first trimester was a difficult one - I was very sick from five weeks to twelve weeks. But, every time I threw up - through the tears (because that's what I do when I'm sick - I cry - surprise!), I was smiling. Lots of vomiting means lots of pregnancy hormones. And lots of pregnancy hormones means healthy baby. And healthy baby was a constant reminder of the AMAZING MIRACLE God had just worked in my body to create a new life.
--------
As I was going through this journey, I was very careful to only reveal parts of the story of what was going on in my body to friends and family. Very, very few people knew the whole story of what was happening in our lives over the last several years. It felt so private, so hard, and I didn't know that I wanted to share how defective I was. Because that was how I felt - defective, broken. Like everything about this body was wrong.
But, from where I am now - seeing the miracle God worked through that time - I feel like I can't help but share my story! It's a miracle how God can take a desperately broken body and form within it a new life.
But that's what he did in us through Christ, isn't it?
I've always been the type of person who imagined God seeing all the sin in my life and being constantly disgusted with me; and I have to constantly preach the gospel to myself - that God sees Christ when he looks at me. That he worked a miracle in my desperately broken and defective soul when he created new life in me through Christ. That I am a new creation!
So this baby, while it may never know what a profound effect its existence has in its Mama's heart, will forever be in our lives a testimony to the redeeming work that Christ did on the cross. This baby will forever be a tangible reminder of the gospel - that God can take something so broken, like a sinful human soul, and create a beautiful new life.
When we got married, we said we wanted to start having children when I was going into my fifth year of teaching. After much prayer and consideration, we felt that this was God's will for our family.
We were planners and we saw no reason why that plan would not work.
Fast forward a few years, and I'm finished with college and masters work. I'm in my third year of teaching. I recently switched doctors because my doctor did not seemed concerned about the issues I was sharing with him. The intense pain in my abdomen upon eating has increased, my digestive system is all out of whack, I am gaining weight for no apparent reason, and I'm exhausted all the time. Add to that that I've been experiencing "that time of the month" for the past four weeks straight - I had enough and went to see my new doctor.
To say that he was concerned would be an understatement. If it's possible to run a test, I think it was run on me that day. A week later, I was back to discuss the results and where we would move from here.
The blood tests confirmed - celiac disease. Celiac disease was slowly destroying my digestive system from the inside out. A gluten free diet would need to be implemented starting today and for the rest of my life. But, one of the rarely discussed side effects of being so sick from celiac - is infertility. Something my recently whack-job menstrual cycles had me worried about.
That same day, my doctor also proposed a diagnosis of Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). To diagnose PCOS officially, you need to do an ultrasound of the ovaries, but I had all of the classic externally visible signs - irregular cycles, male pattern hair growth (on the chin and belly button....that makes you feel sexy!), and terrible acne. PCOS is one of the leading causes of infertility in women.
Great! Two potential causes of infertility in one day - that dream of starting a family in a few short months felt like it was shattering all around me.
My doctor and I discussed a plan to try to heal my body:
1) Gluten Free Diet - doing this would drastically improve the health of my body. And, doing this could reverse the infertility effect of celiac. (I wrote extensively about my celiac healing here.)
2) Chart my cycles for at least the next year to see what is happening with my reproductive system. From there we could get a better idea of what my body does naturally, if PCOS might be the cause of my problems, and what we would need to do to allow Cole and I to start a family.
So, armed with nothing by my super-ability of researching things to death, I left the doctors office with a mixed feeling of relief (we might have an answer!) and trepidation (there's a whole lot going wrong!).
I poured myself into research - first about celiac disease and eating gluten free - because it had the most immediate need to be dealt with. I began implementing a gluten free diet and my digestive system began to heal.
Thanks to a great friend and much more research I learned to chart my cycles and secondary fertility signs. It was official - my body was a wreck! My cycles were coming more regularly than before beginning to heal from celiac (now it was only 20-40 days between cycles instead of 7 days-4 months). But nothing was happening in my ovaries; I was not ovulating. That's kinda necessary to make a baby.
In the winter of my fourth year of teaching, I gathered all of my charts and went back to the doctor. He confirmed that yes, there was a serious problem here. And we started talking about options. First, we talked about diet for women with PCOS. PCOS effects insulin and so food is a big deal in helping the body to operate at it's highest potential ability and to stave of secondary conditions which are very common. Because dealing with infertility wasn't enough - I found out in my research that I am at a much higher risk for diabetes and cancer as a result of PCOS (yay!). I had already researched this quite a bit and begun to make even more drastic changes in my diet. We also started trying a medication that helps some women with PCOS to begin ovulating by affecting insulin levels.
Being on that medication was NOT FUN! Because of my already healthy diet, I did not need a medication to help control my blood sugar and my blood sugar levels began dropping so low that I was tired, physically slow, and got quite dizzy on a very regular basis. It was determined that all of my work on my diet was helping to control my blood sugar quite well (one point for my research skills!) and at my next doctor's appointment, I was taken off those drugs. At that same appointment I was discharged with the official diagnosis of infertility and a referral to see the infertility specialist at the hospital.
A few weeks later, on what was a very dark and rainy Kansas morning (funny how the weather sometimes matches your current feelings), I pulled into the hospital parking lot, with shaking hands wandered my way to the fourth floor, and into the infertility clinic. I met with a nurse practitioner. She was a very very kind person and gently explained PCOS in further detail; we discussed in further detail diet and lifestyle recommendations and also diabetes and cancer. We also discussed options for how Cole and I could begin the process of starting our family. We would be able to begin by using the drug Clomid to convince my body that it was time to develop an egg and release it. I was told that when we were ready to start, to call the clinic (on a certain day in my cycle) and they would send in the prescription. As I walked out of the clinic, I felt on one hand overwhelmed by all the information I had just been given, but more than that, I felt relieved. These people specialized in people like me - in that clinic, I was "normal". They had a plan and we had options!
Several weeks later, I called the office and started medication. I had heard from some friends that being on Clomid made them very emotional. I was ready to ride the roller coaster of emotions (seeing as how I am an incredibly emotional person, anyways!). But surprisingly, I was less emotional than normal. It was kind of a nice change. Part way through the month, I went into the office for a sonogram to see how well the Clomid worked (and, in case I had developed like 8 eggs - to know we shouldn't try for a baby this month!). The first thing the nurse practitioner said while looking at my ovaries was "Wow! Many, many cysts! You definitely have the official diagnosis of PCOS." That was quickly followed by a finger point and a "Do you see that? That's a fully developed egg ready to be released!" I was given a shot of hCG (to trigger my body to ovulate) and told "good luck!"
The day that I ovulated, I was very aware that something was happening that I had never experienced before. All of a sudden I knew what other women were talking about when they said they get very grumpy around that time of the month. Holy cow! I had never felt so grumpy in my life! Just another confirmation that this was not something my body typically did on it's own.
Two weeks later....I woke up early on the morning I had been told to take my pregnancy test. My eyes were filled with tears; I was so nervous and did not want to do this. I have several friends who had been through this process before and I knew that it had taken them many months, sometimes years, to get a positive pregnancy test and I wasn't sure that I was ready to handle having this experience month after month for the next however long. I prayed long and hard (praying for courage through this journey had become a very constant prayer of mine over the last several months). Then, I took the test.
I sat in the next room, where I could not see what was happening, and waited the full time. When I went in, I was fairly certain what I was seeing was a positive. I was sure it was just wishful thinking and checked it, looked at the wall, checked it, looked at the wall....several times. Then I went, at 5:45, and shook Cole awake. "I just took a pregnancy test. I think it's positive but I can't be sure. You HAVE to come check this. I have to know I'm not just crazy." Poor boy - I think I pulled him out of REM sleep. But, he confirmed what I saw - it looked like a positive.
I was so happy, but had to keep that feeling in check. For one, Cole's dad was staying at our house and we weren't going to tell him yet. And two, I needed to have a blood test done to confirm the pregnancy; it could just be a false positive. I called the clinic and had my blood taken at 8:00 am. Then waited all day - until about 3:30 to hear back that, indeed, we were pregnant!!
We told Cole's dad, we called his mom, and my parents.
And I cried....a lot! Some very, very happy tears!
I felt a bit like we had cheated. We conceived in one month of treatment - I don't know anybody who has seen that happen. It was a miracle to say the very least.
God had worked his plan that he had set in our hearts years before out in our lives. It was not AT ALL the way I expected. But, wow, did it stretch me. And teach me to depend on him. And to release any small amount of control that I thought (keyword: thought) I had over my life and surrender myself and my desires fully to him.
--------
The first trimester was a difficult one - I was very sick from five weeks to twelve weeks. But, every time I threw up - through the tears (because that's what I do when I'm sick - I cry - surprise!), I was smiling. Lots of vomiting means lots of pregnancy hormones. And lots of pregnancy hormones means healthy baby. And healthy baby was a constant reminder of the AMAZING MIRACLE God had just worked in my body to create a new life.
--------
As I was going through this journey, I was very careful to only reveal parts of the story of what was going on in my body to friends and family. Very, very few people knew the whole story of what was happening in our lives over the last several years. It felt so private, so hard, and I didn't know that I wanted to share how defective I was. Because that was how I felt - defective, broken. Like everything about this body was wrong.
But, from where I am now - seeing the miracle God worked through that time - I feel like I can't help but share my story! It's a miracle how God can take a desperately broken body and form within it a new life.
But that's what he did in us through Christ, isn't it?
I've always been the type of person who imagined God seeing all the sin in my life and being constantly disgusted with me; and I have to constantly preach the gospel to myself - that God sees Christ when he looks at me. That he worked a miracle in my desperately broken and defective soul when he created new life in me through Christ. That I am a new creation!
So this baby, while it may never know what a profound effect its existence has in its Mama's heart, will forever be in our lives a testimony to the redeeming work that Christ did on the cross. This baby will forever be a tangible reminder of the gospel - that God can take something so broken, like a sinful human soul, and create a beautiful new life.
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